by Jeffrey Hull
If you hold on to the handle, she said, it's easier to maintain the fake image of control. But, it's more fun if you just let the wind carry you." Brian Andreas
How do you deal with these scary times? Would you like to learn how to release fear and get back on track in tough money-based times? Today I want to share with you two real-life examples of "life-moving/changing" in action. The stories I'm about to share here are real (the names have been changed to protect the innocent), and I think it is safe to sdownload (5) yes that their stories of trouble in dealing with Florida real estate are not rare--at least not these days! The situations that each of these clients find themselves in are almost the same. The ways that each deals with FEAR are completely different. Let's see what we can learn from their trouble(s).
This is a story of two Gary's. Gary #1 is in his early 60's, a semi-retired professional, living in Florida. A few years ago he and a friend became next-door neighbors in the second-home condo world of (land along the beach/along the beach) Florida real estate. Buying a beautiful top-floor condo right near the water, near the peak of the market, Gary #1 looked at the location, the up-scale developments going up (in all ways), and decided this was a great time to make a solid investment. He had done well with Florida real estate in the past, and as the market was roaring along on all tubes, all indicators--beach front, fancy/expensive, searched-for location, growing population, good financing, etc.--signaled that this was an obvious, easy thing.
Gary #2 is much younger, mid-30's New York professional, just getting into career planning, 401K's, and investments. He too (bought something for money) an ocean front condo--on a different coast--in a fast-growing, rich neighborhood. He too, got great financing. He too, believed that the market would continue to head up.
Both Gary's thought of themselves as "long term" (people or businesss who give money to help start businesses); that is, at least a couple of years! At an upward rate of appreciation in the market of 10% or more each year, both believed that they would make good money if they decided to sell within about 3 years.
We know what happened next. Hurricanes hit Florida all the time, but money-based tidal waves are (compared to other things) new important thing/big event. Mortgage serious problems, quickly dropping home prices, (acts of forcing people out of a house because they didn't pay) all around, rising taxes, and few renters...all the worst possible events have happened.
Jump forward two years. Both Gary's are in shock, nervous/eager and afraid/scary. "Stressed out" would be the phrase I most often hear. For a while they thought the storm would reduce (or stop), the tide would turn...but the opposite has proven true. With the worldwide (related to managing money) disaster hitting every corner of the money-based globe, the situation in Florida has just gotten worse. Both Gary's find themselves in the "perfect storm"--losing money every month on their mortgages, no renters in sight, no prospects for (money made/good thing received) if they sell...and a month is beginning to feel "long term".
The road to Florida riches is paved with good plans/desires. Both Gary's are great guys. Not crooks, not very stupid people, not even sneaky and dishonest (people or businesss who give money to help start businesses). Given the facts and figures they had to work with at the time, both investments truly looked doable/possible. But, as we now know, no one can (describe a possible future event) the future, and the tide simply turned against them. Looking back we might say the storm was unavoidable, visible on the (line in the distance where the Earth and sky meet). Of course, far enough out on the (line in the distance where the Earth and sky meet) there is always a storm, and always clear skies also. What are we going to get on any given day? Unknown.
So how have my two Gary's did/done in the destructive storm? Both have become incredibly nervous/eager, worried--and yes, afraid/scary--that the situation, both emotionally and (related to money), is not (able to last/helping the planet). Both have felt the tiny bit of regret, (accusing yourself of a crime), and self doubt. In Life-Shifting language, both have found themselves in a RUT. Stuck: change is needed/demanded, but fear is in control. We've all been there. Real estate is just a (physical thing that refers to an idea or emotion) for life. We all know what it feels like to reach the END of something and be oh-so-(full of doubt and hesitation) to let go, of a deal, a relationship, a job.
Gary #1, maybe with the wisdom of years, recognized when fear was taking over. And he did two key things: 1. He talked about it and asked for support; 2. he made the decision to sell; to let go and move on. Gary #2, maybe due to his childlike lack of knowledge and feelings of embarrassment (in front of many people) upon discovering that this kind of thing can REALLY happen, did the opposite: 1. He told no one (except me); 2. He pretended that all was well (recognize denial in action?: see previous post "Fear Not!?").
Of course, we all know where my story is heading: Gary #1, with the help of a kind group of friends and professionals, worked through his fear and regret, made the decision to sell, took a deep breath and accepted the big loss on his (money-based records of a company) (very painful!), and moved on. A few months of extreme pain, yes, but release, relief, and peace followed. And, as you might expect, there is good news from Gary #2: he heard about the story of Gary #1 and got the messagedownload (4): he is beginning to shift. He is sharing his story with friends and family, getting (opinions about what could or should be done about a situation) from professionals and asking for help. Soon, he too, will make a decision and move on. He may need to declare (not having enough money to pay bills) if the property won't sell--even at a loss--but even that, for a hard-working, professional in the most important part of his career, is not the end of the world.
Now you may be wondering if I'm writing this story to make Gary #2 look bad. Not at all. I'm writing this story because I think we are all more like Gary #2 most of the time. I know I am. Be honest with yourself: how many times have you stewed on a decision, (separating far from others) yourself and holding on to your fear and fear and stress about the need to END SOMETHING--an investment gone sour, a relationship over, a job at a dead end? We've all been there. Letting go is hard. BUT it is a necessary part of any cycle of self-renewal.
Everything in life moves in a cycle of birth, growth, death, and re-birth. When we can recognize the cycle as natural, and not let our fear tighten/narrow us mentally and emotionally, when we can join the human race and ask for help instead of hiding out, pretending that everyone else has got it handled...well, then we can move through fear, let go of whatever it is that needs to be released--condos, stocks, girlfriends, parents--and get back in the flow of life.
Gary #2 is most of us. Gary #1 is my life-shifting role model; a master teacher in the school of RELEASING FEAR and NAVIGATING LIFE CHANGE. In a lucky way, he has not only moved on from the ash heap of burned out condo investments, he is out in the world, sharing his wisdom and (understanding of deep things) with others, teaching those Gary #2's that roam the streets of Florida (and in other places) looking like caged animals--nervous/eager, starving for support, alone.
My hat is off to both Gary's. I thank them for the opportunity to learn--to see ourselves in their trouble(s) and to see the gift of re-invention in the life-shifting mastery of Gary #1. So...here's the summary point:
If you find yourself in a bad money-based situation and over created/formed with fear, fear and stress and stress, take a lesson from the play book of Gary #1. Step back, recognize your fear, accept it and move forward. Talk about it with others; ask for help. When you're ready, make a decision and let go....and let GOD.
If you hold on to the handle, she said, it's easier to maintain the fake image of control. But, it's more fun if you just let the wind carry you." Brian Andreas
How do you deal with these scary times? Would you like to learn how to release fear and get back on track in tough money-based times? Today I want to share with you two real-life examples of "life-moving/changing" in action. The stories I'm about to share here are real (the names have been changed to protect the innocent), and I think it is safe to sdownload (5) yes that their stories of trouble in dealing with Florida real estate are not rare--at least not these days! The situations that each of these clients find themselves in are almost the same. The ways that each deals with FEAR are completely different. Let's see what we can learn from their trouble(s).
This is a story of two Gary's. Gary #1 is in his early 60's, a semi-retired professional, living in Florida. A few years ago he and a friend became next-door neighbors in the second-home condo world of (land along the beach/along the beach) Florida real estate. Buying a beautiful top-floor condo right near the water, near the peak of the market, Gary #1 looked at the location, the up-scale developments going up (in all ways), and decided this was a great time to make a solid investment. He had done well with Florida real estate in the past, and as the market was roaring along on all tubes, all indicators--beach front, fancy/expensive, searched-for location, growing population, good financing, etc.--signaled that this was an obvious, easy thing.
Gary #2 is much younger, mid-30's New York professional, just getting into career planning, 401K's, and investments. He too (bought something for money) an ocean front condo--on a different coast--in a fast-growing, rich neighborhood. He too, got great financing. He too, believed that the market would continue to head up.
Both Gary's thought of themselves as "long term" (people or businesss who give money to help start businesses); that is, at least a couple of years! At an upward rate of appreciation in the market of 10% or more each year, both believed that they would make good money if they decided to sell within about 3 years.
We know what happened next. Hurricanes hit Florida all the time, but money-based tidal waves are (compared to other things) new important thing/big event. Mortgage serious problems, quickly dropping home prices, (acts of forcing people out of a house because they didn't pay) all around, rising taxes, and few renters...all the worst possible events have happened.
Jump forward two years. Both Gary's are in shock, nervous/eager and afraid/scary. "Stressed out" would be the phrase I most often hear. For a while they thought the storm would reduce (or stop), the tide would turn...but the opposite has proven true. With the worldwide (related to managing money) disaster hitting every corner of the money-based globe, the situation in Florida has just gotten worse. Both Gary's find themselves in the "perfect storm"--losing money every month on their mortgages, no renters in sight, no prospects for (money made/good thing received) if they sell...and a month is beginning to feel "long term".
The road to Florida riches is paved with good plans/desires. Both Gary's are great guys. Not crooks, not very stupid people, not even sneaky and dishonest (people or businesss who give money to help start businesses). Given the facts and figures they had to work with at the time, both investments truly looked doable/possible. But, as we now know, no one can (describe a possible future event) the future, and the tide simply turned against them. Looking back we might say the storm was unavoidable, visible on the (line in the distance where the Earth and sky meet). Of course, far enough out on the (line in the distance where the Earth and sky meet) there is always a storm, and always clear skies also. What are we going to get on any given day? Unknown.
So how have my two Gary's did/done in the destructive storm? Both have become incredibly nervous/eager, worried--and yes, afraid/scary--that the situation, both emotionally and (related to money), is not (able to last/helping the planet). Both have felt the tiny bit of regret, (accusing yourself of a crime), and self doubt. In Life-Shifting language, both have found themselves in a RUT. Stuck: change is needed/demanded, but fear is in control. We've all been there. Real estate is just a (physical thing that refers to an idea or emotion) for life. We all know what it feels like to reach the END of something and be oh-so-(full of doubt and hesitation) to let go, of a deal, a relationship, a job.
Gary #1, maybe with the wisdom of years, recognized when fear was taking over. And he did two key things: 1. He talked about it and asked for support; 2. he made the decision to sell; to let go and move on. Gary #2, maybe due to his childlike lack of knowledge and feelings of embarrassment (in front of many people) upon discovering that this kind of thing can REALLY happen, did the opposite: 1. He told no one (except me); 2. He pretended that all was well (recognize denial in action?: see previous post "Fear Not!?").
Of course, we all know where my story is heading: Gary #1, with the help of a kind group of friends and professionals, worked through his fear and regret, made the decision to sell, took a deep breath and accepted the big loss on his (money-based records of a company) (very painful!), and moved on. A few months of extreme pain, yes, but release, relief, and peace followed. And, as you might expect, there is good news from Gary #2: he heard about the story of Gary #1 and got the messagedownload (4): he is beginning to shift. He is sharing his story with friends and family, getting (opinions about what could or should be done about a situation) from professionals and asking for help. Soon, he too, will make a decision and move on. He may need to declare (not having enough money to pay bills) if the property won't sell--even at a loss--but even that, for a hard-working, professional in the most important part of his career, is not the end of the world.
Now you may be wondering if I'm writing this story to make Gary #2 look bad. Not at all. I'm writing this story because I think we are all more like Gary #2 most of the time. I know I am. Be honest with yourself: how many times have you stewed on a decision, (separating far from others) yourself and holding on to your fear and fear and stress about the need to END SOMETHING--an investment gone sour, a relationship over, a job at a dead end? We've all been there. Letting go is hard. BUT it is a necessary part of any cycle of self-renewal.
Everything in life moves in a cycle of birth, growth, death, and re-birth. When we can recognize the cycle as natural, and not let our fear tighten/narrow us mentally and emotionally, when we can join the human race and ask for help instead of hiding out, pretending that everyone else has got it handled...well, then we can move through fear, let go of whatever it is that needs to be released--condos, stocks, girlfriends, parents--and get back in the flow of life.
Gary #2 is most of us. Gary #1 is my life-shifting role model; a master teacher in the school of RELEASING FEAR and NAVIGATING LIFE CHANGE. In a lucky way, he has not only moved on from the ash heap of burned out condo investments, he is out in the world, sharing his wisdom and (understanding of deep things) with others, teaching those Gary #2's that roam the streets of Florida (and in other places) looking like caged animals--nervous/eager, starving for support, alone.
My hat is off to both Gary's. I thank them for the opportunity to learn--to see ourselves in their trouble(s) and to see the gift of re-invention in the life-shifting mastery of Gary #1. So...here's the summary point:
If you find yourself in a bad money-based situation and over created/formed with fear, fear and stress and stress, take a lesson from the play book of Gary #1. Step back, recognize your fear, accept it and move forward. Talk about it with others; ask for help. When you're ready, make a decision and let go....and let GOD.
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